Rebuild Your Confidence

May 25, 2023 |

Rebuild Your Confidence After It Has Been Shattered – Self Love


Rebuild Your Confidence After It Has Been Shattered – Self Love


Do you feel you lack confidence, have low self-esteem, believe that you're not as worthy as other people, or view failure as something you must avoid at all costs?


You’re not alone, did you know that according to a study carried out by The Dove Self Esteem Fund, 70% of women don’t know how to be confident?


The ever growing pressure of social media, filtered images and so many people portraying a false image of what their life really looks like it makes it harder to see through the falsities, we can allow this to influence who we are and how we believe people should see us.


In reality how many Women can actually honestly stand in a mirror and love everything about ourselves. Truthly very few! We are human we have flaws, the important thing is, if you want to be truly confident you must learn to love and appreciate everything about yourself. Self-love is paramount to discovering core confidence.


What is Confidence, Really?

You may hear a lot of people mistake confidence with arrogance and in some cases this may be true. However, in most cases this reflects the person assuming. You see when you have those thoughts of other’s, it usually means there is something about that person that you secretly wish to see in yourself. It is important to be honest and authentic about your thoughts, there is no shame in taking tips from people you admire or even envy.


If you want to live being the best version of yourself, you must confront your insecurities, embrace them and learn to admire them.



The Key to Consistent Success

Self-confidence is the key to having consistent success. It is your fuel to refill you when you’re feeling low, it’s fuelling your mindset, your motivation and your heart. When you feel drained, low, and empty, this means you need to refill your confidence tank.


Do not make the same mistake as many - By looking to external sources such as, money, relationships and material things. This is situational confidence and is not sustainable. 


Core confidence does not come from anything external. Situational confidence may come from these; however, it is not real and will only plaster over the real issues you have.


If you want to become confidently unstoppable, it comes from your CORE, inside of you. Truly loving and accepting who you are catapults everything in your life.


You must do the work, endure the painful process of self-reflection, get ready to ask yourself some tough and vulnerable questions. Core confidence is waiting for you to unleash it, embrace yourself put your arms around yourself and truly love who you are.



Tips to help you on your way!


Get Clear

Confront yourself and find clarity, recognise how you feel now and what you want to change to enable you to feel more confident. Look to other people who inspire you for motivation. Journal your thoughts and how you would like to describe the new unstoppable confident you. Be specific here it will help you later.



Be Brave

As Tony Robbins says, “If it scares you, you MUST absolutely do it”. You are reading this because you want to change, so let’s get brave and take the action to make the changes. Even it is small steps, that’s OK just keep moving forward. Doing things that scare you will build confidence all on its own.



Decide About How You're Going to Move Forward

Accepting doesn't mean you're okay with what’s happened, it means that instead of dwelling over the past, you can decide to move forward in a positive way. This may take time and effort on your part, but if you want things to change then you must take control of the situation and make it change. Reading your journal will remind you of the how and why you want to become more confident and will help you stay consistent.


Authenticity is Key

Focus on being authentic instead of perfect. When we try to do things perfectly, we often overthink everything and get stuck in a paralysing cycle of self-criticism and comparison. We also tend to set unrealistic expectations for ourselves because we think that’s what perfection looks like, which can take a toll on our self-confidence when we fall short of meeting these goals.



Focus on Yourself, Not Others

Remember this: THE OPINION OF OTHERS DOES NOT MATTER! It is your opinion of yourself that counts. So don't waste any more time worrying about what other people think. Their thoughts are merely a reflection of their own insecurities. Spend that energy on improving yourself and taking one step closer toward recovery each day. Look at your circle closely if you are surrounded by people who make you feel like crap, it’s time to change your circle.



Look Back

Think back over your life’s experiences so far and make a list of all the times you overcame obstacles, solved problems, and made it through hard times. Then use that list as a reminder that YOU CAN DO HARD THINGS!



Find a Support System: family, friends, or hire a professional.

Sometimes you need to talk about your troubles with someone who can give you good advice and help you see things in a new light. Don’t be afraid to reach out for help and support.


You deserve to live a life of purpose and fulfilment. You are only one step away from living that life. It can be hard to imagine things will get better when you're in the middle of a rough patch. In life, we all encounter hard times that can throw us off balance and leave us feeling less than confident. We know this because we've all been there. Even if you’re feeling like a complete mess, your self-confidence is still there within you—you just need to know how to tap into it. You know what they say: No one knows you as you know you.


If you are struggling to know who you are or what comes next. ....


I got you! 


I can create a bridge for you to walk away from that confusion and lead you to a place where you can find purpose and clarity. You will build resilience along the way and learn to live a life guided by your own purpose and vision. 


It is possible for you to get back in control of your mind and thoughts, so you are not being affected by the roller-coaster emotions that come with change. To learn more about the impact change can have on your life and how to move through it with more clarity, book my 30 minutes free consultation call.  


How I can help

I have a fantastically supportive group of women who are or have been in the same position as you find yourself in right now. If you’re not already a member, I invite you to join my FREE Facebook Community 30+ Positively Starting Over.

You may also find my Improve Your Life in 7 Days journaling challenge helpful and when you sign up you will also receive my bonus 10 Steps to Starting Over guide to help you really keep the momentum of starting over.

As always, please know that I am here for you, whether it’s a virtual coffee to talk through what’s going on, or whether you need more intensive support to move on from being in abusive relationship, you can schedule a complimentary, no obligation call with me.

Emma x

The Empowerment Coach for women who want to transform their lives, become unstoppable and conquer the fears that have been holding you back from truly living YOUR BEST life.

Categories: : Confidence, rebuilding, self love